It may be irresistible to be comparing pains.
The only way you should be evaluating them is by subtraction. If there’s none left, they were equal; if there’s some, one was greater, but don’t miss the point. What’s more important: the difference now is manageable. You wouldn’t want to be adding them together. Who’s to handle the surplus? You could apply division, but what is it if not repeated subtraction? Don’t get me started on multiplication.
Either subtract the others’ pains or don’t get involved in their struggles. Be a source of relief, not a burden.
Reveries That I Call Poetry 